


One hell of a drug

by Yolonolobroyo



Series: Sincerely, me [2]
Category: Aftertale - Fandom, Reapertale - Fandom, Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Afterdeath is one hell of a drug (lol comic reference), Background scifell - Freeform, But I don't want it, Gah why do I do this, Geno just stop sweetie you've done enough, Help, I Ship It, I Will Go Down With This Ship, I have a serious writing problem and I need help, I'm supposed to be doing things, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Same goes for you Reaper, Same universe as DAYHII, Soulmate AU, Take this. Judge me., Tsundere Geno obviously, no smut ever
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-04
Updated: 2018-02-16
Packaged: 2018-12-11 05:27:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 2,950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11707734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yolonolobroyo/pseuds/Yolonolobroyo
Summary: Afterdeath soulmate journal au.





	1. There's no happy ending, so they say (not for me anyway)

**Author's Note:**

> So in the comments section of DAYHII, I mentioned wanting to write a Afterdeath soulmate au.  
>  Here it is.  
> Do with this what you will, I will cross post it on Tumblr, my url will be in the end notes.
> 
> Judge me, point out any Errors you might find, comments and kudos are appreciated.

Sans was tired.   
  
Once, he had taken comfort in the fact that no matter what the kid did, the world would go on. they could do a pacifist run, and they'd get to the surface, or they could go full on homicidal maniac or anything in between, but the world wouldn't end. Children would be born, people would die, and life would go on.   
  
Not anymore.

Because in this time loop, life couldn't go on. They were stuck with the same people, same dialogue, same days _over and over again_. He had to watch everyone _suffer_ , since as the Judge, he couldn't step in until the end.   
  
He  **hated**  it. 

How could his 'friend' treat everyone like this? True, they wouldn't remember, but it still happened.  
  
This was the sixty-seventh genocide run in a row.   
  
He was so tired of living. Tired of fighting, and so, so sick and tired of _killing_.

  
Footsteps echoed through the corridor, or as he called it, the judgement hall. His jaw clenched and his fists shook in his pockets.   
  
Who was really being punished here? Because the kid sure as hell wasn't learning anything, and every time it felt like his soul was being torn apart.  
  
That's his problem. He's too sentimental. He looked at them and he saw Papyrus as he was as a child.

Except Pap wouldn't do this. Pap wouldn't hurt everyone. Pap wouldn't torture him like this.  
  
They were nothing like his brother.  
  
They were nothing worth protecting.  
~~~~  
_**They were nothing**_.  
  
He gave his usual speech about birds and hell and attacked, doing the same song and dance they'd been doing for the equivalent of _years_  now.  
  
Sans was so tired.  
  
The burning pain of the knife across his ribs barely even registered anymore.

~~ _**R E S E T** _ ~~

_**OR** _

~~ _**C O N T I N U E?** _ ~~

 

~~ _**R E S E T.** _ ~~

~~~~He just wanted this to stop. Forever.

**No matter what it takes.**


	2. A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Death

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey wow still doing this without any planning or schedule. Yay. Still have no actual fucking clue where this is going.

Death had been doing this for so long.

Every couple of seconds, someone died. Every couple seconds, he had to kill someone. Sure, he hadn't murdered them, but he still had to strike them down, watch the life bleed from their eyes and souls.

He saw mothers come across the bodies or dust of their children or lovers and vice versa. He's seen horrible things, and it's _killing_ him inside, to see how far the mortals have fallen, it hurts when they fling insults at him - _come on he's just doing his job it's not his fault it's for your own good-_ but it's even worse when people beg him to reap them and  _he can't please understand you're not on the list you can't die yet it's too soon you have so much to do_ it's even worse when they finally die and they fall to the ground, crying with relief and joy, thanking him over and over. 

He opened a portal to his realm and sighed, blinking back tears. His scythe felt heavy with the weight of the stolen souls. There was a heavy weight on his chest - when wasn't there? - and a quiet  _'ping'_ in the back of his mind. He sighed, trying to alleviate some of the pressure on his ribs as he slashed open a portal. A line from a song he'd heard during the last reaping repeated in his mind as a strangely familiar skeleton monster received a nasty slash from a knife wielding human.

_Another one gone, another one gone, another one bites the dust~_

He'd be among the first to admit that his sense of humor had grown quite morbid.

He let his feet touch the ground, not wanting to startle the poor creature, and walked forward. They didn't yell, didn't cry, didn't even beg to be spared. They simply waited for him to reap them, looking him in the face without a hint of accusation. Just misery that he'd seen too many times on the faces of the ones who thanked him in the end.

And, not for the first time, Death asked himself 'did they fall, or did they let go?' 

But then he saw something in their face that he hadn't seen in the others.

**Determination.**

He blinked, confused and a bit frightened. He felt magic and something stronger pressing against him, trying to shove him back towards the portal. The skeleton's dust, which had been drifting aimlessly to the ground, floated up to his body, carefully reconstructing him. The force was getting stronger. Oh well. He might as well leave anyway, seeing as how the monster was being revived. Death has no place with the living.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly don't think Geno's that much of a tsundere really. Maybe just a bit, but honestly, I'm not surprised he's a little emotionally distant. 
> 
> I mean come on, he's been fighting Chara for literal years, having to go through the emotional trauma of watching everyone he's ever cared about be murdered for no apparent reason, having to face them himself each time, which most people would be too terrified to do, only to inevitably fail and die hundreds of times without even a short break in between. 
> 
> And even when he uses the equivalent of a magical super soul steroid which should give him the advantage, he's still not good enough, starts to die again, only to realize his entire body is melting.
> 
> He does the only thing he can think of that will let him live long enough to get another shot to end the resets, but then finds that he's landed himself in his own personal purgatory, and I think even before that point, he would try to distance himself from his friends- except Papyrus, he could never stop caring about his bro- to keep from breaking down faster than he already is. 
> 
> I think part of the reason Geno is unwilling to see what a good person Reaper can be is because Reaper is the literal personification of what he's sacrificed so much to avoid. He's a reminder of how much he's failed. As a Judge, as a friend, as a person, and as a brother. Geno is just a traumatized guy trying his best to stop this mayhem and protect his loved ones. 
> 
> As they say, they road to hell is paced with good intentions.
> 
> That's why Geno's my favorite.


	3. Brand new day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hurt/comfort.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was written and posted much faster than it usually is because of an amazing app I plan to continue using called Writer Plus.
> 
> Also, fun fact, this is only 33 words shorter than the first two combined.  
> Geno - Loverofpiggies  
> Reaper- Renrink

Sans felt Chara's determination to reset the world. His last thought before time reversed was that next time, he wouldn't do this. He wouldn't just lay down and take it. He had to do something...but what?

Changing his attack pattern was a temporary fix, but it would do until he found a better one.

Seven resets later, Chara was learning again, and Sans still didn't have a solution. Until he visited Alphys in the eighth run.

_**Determination**_.

A human soul trait that allows the soul to persist after death. The will to live, the resolve to change fate. If a monster gains a high concentration of determination, they melt, Undyne being the only one known to possess it naturally. But, with his magic ability, his connection to the timelines, and his own resolve, he would be able to handle a bit more than others. Not as much as Undyne of course, that would be stupid, just enough to give him the advantage.

He went through the ninth run. Alphys had evacuated everyone by now. Which meant that he could put his plan into action.

The old labcoat felt cool and slightly scratchy on his bones. He didn't really want to wear it - too many memories he didn't care to revisit right now - but he had to. Lab safety rules and all that jazz. Plus, the amalgamates were less likely to attack him in a panic than if he wore the hoodie still covered in his brother's dust from his memorial.He turned a corner and sighed.

"Finally," he muttered, having found the determination extract at last. He tugged the sterile syringe from the baggie in his pocket, slowly filling it with DT. He pulled out his soul. It was cracked, but it was still white, surrounded by a soft azure halo. He carefully pushed the needle into one of the larger cracks.

He could feel the effects immediately. The searing pain made his vision go white. He heard screaming in the distance, and he vaguely realized that the shrieks of agony were his. He felt his bones soften slightly. He felt certain that he would melt, he'd injected too much, he should have been more careful with his calculations, he should have-

A wet substance sliding down his skull. Instantly, the pain of the DT running through and mingling with his magic eased. Soon, he could manage if he breathed deeply. He opened his sockets - when did he close them? - to see a big white blob with a giant hole where it's face should've been. Sans gasped, jerking away from the monster, only to recognize the monster. He sighed in relief.

"Endogeny." The amalgamate gave a series of gurgling barks.

_~~"What were you thinking, Smalls?! You only have one HP! If we hadn't found you when we did..."~~ _ The commanding voice trailed off.

**"Hey, y-you don't think he was gonna...?"** Sans had an uncanny feeling that the monster was staring, waiting for a denial. But a denial of what?

......

Oh.

O H.

"No! No, I wasn't trying to kill myself! I-I just needed a little more determination. Guess I didn't measure properly, heheh."

The orifice of Endogeny's face narrowed in what he guessed what suspicion.

~~_"Why? What could possibly justify determination consumption?"_ ~~ Should he tell them? Did it matter? It would all be reset any- no. It wouldn't. This was the last reset. It had to be. There was no way the human could beat him now.

Still... Was it so awful to wish to spill it all out to someone who had ended up doing the same?

... Just a little. Not all of it. Just enough to relieve a bit of the weight on his shoulders. Just enough to get that suspicious stare off of him.

So he told them.

Sans told Endogeny about the human. About Papyrus. About everyone who had been killed. About his duty as Judge. By the end, he was sobbing with red tears running down his face. The pain in his chest eased, just slightly, and for a second, he let himself feel okay. Endogeny wasn't judging him, wasn't acting like he was crazy like others had in the first few resets, when he'd still been hopeful. They were just... listening. He felt calm for the first time in a long time.

He embraced Endogeny's comforting silence, and let himself just be.

He was okay...for now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My Tumblr is Suchamazingness


	4. Caring hands

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Endogeny knows shit.

Endogeny was fairly observant. They had all been part of the Guard after all, and there were so many of them in one body.

But when they saw the skeleton monster screaming and writhing on the floor, they panicked. Looking closer, they noticed that his bones were melting. Dropping some of the healing froth that dripped from the gaping hole in their face, Endogeny slumped when he stopped wailing and melting, a collective sigh of relief leaving them, heavy enough to scatter papers off of the desk. They could feel his soul screaming in fear and pain. A thought hit them like a freight train.

Was he going to....?

What would have happened if they hadn't shown up?

What had made him so miserable, if he was trying to die?

They wanted to know. They needed to know why. They asked. And the monster told them his story. Loss, fear, pain, DETERMINATION. Once he started, he couldn't seem to stop. Not until his voice died, mouth moving silently as he hiccupped and sobbed, blue tears and red determination flowing down his face in bucketfuls.

God, why did these things have to happen to good people? He was just doing what he had to. Being the Judge of the Underground was a hard, ugly job. Fortunately, it was rarely called upon, but when it was...

Endogeny remembered the last Judge, somewhat. Individual memories were muddled, but present. They remembered what they had to do when the soul of Justice strolled into the Underground, having killed innocent people for 'attacking them without provocation'. They sighed.

'Poor child,' a soft feminine voice murmured within their minds.

'He's hardly a child,' a slightly gruffer voice scoffed.

'Still, he's rather young for a role such as this. Why on Earth would Asgore choose someone so small? He could have had a good life.'

The former guard members' emotions whirled around inside wildly, a dangerous mix of pity and sorrow for the one before them and nightmarish fury and the king and human for putting him in this position.

Endogeny sighed, slowly calming their raging emotions to be properly dealt with later. The small skeleton wept pitifully on the floor next to them. Guided mostly by instinct, they quietly settled down on the floor beside him, offering silent comfort. Slowly, his breathing calmed into a steady rhythm, soul finally calmed into a relaxed state.

They couldn't do anything for his troubles with the human or his job, but they could do something for his wailing soul. If they could provide a bit of comfort and a shoulder to cry on, they knew that for Smalls, that would be more than enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My Tumblr is Suchamazingness.
> 
> I don't really like how this came out.
> 
> Comments and kudos are welcome, you don't have to give them tho.


	5. Pinch pinch bitch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heheh... It's uh... it's been a while, huh?...
> 
> Here's your super short chapter that's super late.

Death felt the familiar pinch in his soul and quickly reaped the wailing mother before him. Her death almost physically pained him. She didn't last long after the death of her son.

He sighed and let the slight pain drag him to his next victim.

A dark, cold basement somehow managed to carry the scent of misery, ramen, and antiseptic. Wails of pain made him wince. So it was one of these endings, hmm? Some lives end in pain and misery. A lot of them, actually. Death allowed the tug to guide him as he roamed the lab (he recognized it now - many unfortunate souls had escaped him here in many worlds, forever free from him), following the screams until he came upon a awfully familiar skeleton monster writhing in agony on the floor. He glanced at his soul and realized why he seemed familiar - he had already eluded him many times.

Of course, many people could say the same. Children in hospitals, Mothers whose bodies should have been too small to survive childbirth, victims of attempted murder and abuse and so many other horrific things that made him feel sick as he thought of how far the mortals had fallen-

But that wasn't important right now. He just needed to get the SOUL and move on to the next. But he found something that greatly disturbed him.

The monster was melting as he dusted, like many of the pitiful escapees who were sheltered here. Would another be whisked out of his reach by the overprotective Mother that was Life? He couldn't leave another job undone, he was on thin ice with Asgore already.

He raised his scythe and swung, but just as he brought it down, a giant goopy mass raced around the corner and placed themselves between Death and his would be passenger to the afterlife. Death knew they hadn't seen him and couldn't hear him, but he swore colorfully at them in hundreds of languages and curses he'd learned over the millennia. Maybe the fact that they couldn't hear was what tempted him. Normally he wouldn't say such things to people if he knew they could hear. Either way, he said some things that would make Undyne blush heavily, and so he apologized, though it made no difference to them.

He sighed and carefully wiped away the sludge these creatures - amalgamates, Lady Alphys called them - always left behind. The screaming had died (ha) down, and the skeleton and amalgamate had a conversation that Death didn't bother listening to, because it's very rude, and despite Life's insistence, he was not a savage, _thank you very much._  He left, footsteps cloaked by the quiet but ever present hum of machinery.


	6. Here goes no mercy-!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sans can't see how this will play out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haaaaaa fuck it's been a while. I'm screaming. Always. It never ends.

Sans’ sight had been permanently damaged by the Determination experience. He'd lost the sight in his right eye along with his depth perception. The next few resets were hard, the child easily dodging as he tried to adjust to his new disability. It was many, many days before he finally learned to judge distance, and when he did…

 

The kid didn't know what hit them.

 

A run later, the kid was now trying to actively avoid him. They cowered behind Papyrus when they came to his house (until they killed him), they snuck around the woods to evade his watchful gaze from his station, they once tried to kill Toriel and stay in the Ruins until he'd had enough and  _ dragged them out _ to receive their punishment. Sans was not an easy man to avoid.

 

**_R E S E T_ ** .

 

There goes Toriel. He doesn't even go to the door anymore.

 

**_L O A D I N G…_ **

 

The True Heroine melts, pulls herself together, dusts, melts, and Sans turns away from watching his friend suffer a fate he faced not long ago.

 

**_L O A D I N G…_ **

 

The Underground mourns it's one and only star.

 

**_L O A D I N G…_ **

 

He hits them with a wave of bone attacks. The image of his brother's scarf is seared into his mind. He sees it when he sleeps, when he fights, he sees it in his blind eye even though he knows it isn't possible. The kid is impaled, their body gruesomely mangled.

 

**_L O A D I N G…_ **

 

They're met with a fleet of blasters. Their body is charred and smoking. Their blood seems to boil along their blackened skin.

 

**_L O A D I N G…_ **

 

Karma's a bitch.

 

**_L O A D I N G…_ **

 

Isn't it, Chara?

 

**_L O A D I N G…_ **

 

He’s tired.

 

**_L O A D I N G…_ **

 

He keeps going.

 

**_L O A D I N G…_ **

 

His entire body cries out for him to _ please, please just stop already _ but his mind says  _ not until they do _ and so he keeps fighting.

 

**_L O A D I N G…_ **

 

He starts to shake. Belatedly, he realizes what's happening. His body has been worn to exhaustion and refuses to go any further. He desperately pushes for his magic to hold up, give him enough for one last killing blow, but it is outside of his grasp, and he finds his eyes sliding closed against his will and he feels the burning icy metal meet his ribs and neatly slash through them and cut straight to his Soul.

 

The melting flaking feeling returns and he knows, without a doubt, this is his last reset. A dark form hovers over the ground, floats to him, everything is burning burningburningburning and then a swift relief comes in a fuzzy silver cold thing slashes through him-

 

But nothing happens.

 

The steel (?) goes straight through his ashy mush and he snaps his fingers to shortcut out purely on instinct because  _ no no no this is not the end they're still out there they can't get away with this n o- _

 

He’s surrounded by black.

 

Dark. Darker and Darker.

  
The darkness keeps  **_g r o w i n g._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I now have two blogs.
> 
> Suchamazingness (my main you all know that one by now) 
> 
> And
> 
> Scifellaus (entirely for my scifell aus)

**Author's Note:**

> Tumblr:  
> Suchamazingness  
> Prepare for stupidity and gay skeletons.


End file.
